It’s always a fun thought experiment to imagine what you would do and what you would buy if you won the lottery. If you had a million dollars, where would you be right now? Maybe you’d buy a beautiful home on the coast, or maybe you’d travel the world and see all the sights. Perhaps you’d start your own business?
It’s fun to imagine these things but of course it is also somewhat limiting. There’s only so much that you could accomplish by winning the lottery and of course this is all tied to what you can achieve with financial clout alone. What would be much more interesting would be to imagine that you had three wishes.
If you met a genie and they said you could have any three wishes, what would you wish for?
I’m not asking hypothetically, I want you to play along and answer. What would you wish for right now?
Here are the rules: you cannot wish for more wishes. The Aladdin rule that you can’t wish for someone to love you is out though. That’s totally on the cards.
The other rule is that you’re not allowed altruism. So, no wishing for world peace, no wishing that your friends will be happy. This is about you. This is about what you want. Two more rules: it has to be physically possible. No wishing that you were immortal or that you could fly. Finally, no wishing for anything as a ‘means to an end’. In other words, don’t wish for a billion dollars and think that’s you sorted because you can buy all the rest. That’s just boring… Be more specific!
But nothing else is off the table. You can have riches, you can have fame, you can have a boat. You can become a rock star, you can find love, you can write a book. You name it.
What do you want? Write it down and put it somewhere safe.
Now here is the good news: I’m about to become your magical genie. Minus the beard and the song and dance number. Otherwise though, I’m going to give you what you want.
Or rather, I’m going to do something even better. I’m going to show you how to get everything you want. I’m going to show you how to become your own genie.
Because if you teach a guy to fish and blah, blah, blah. Enough pre-amble. Let’s do this. In this book, you’ll learn how to get out there and get what you want for yourself and to stop settling for less.
Chapter 1: The Law of Attraction – True or False?
In this first chapter, I’m going to talk about the thing you’re probably already expecting me to talk about. That’s the law of attraction. It seems only fitting that I touch on this first, seeing as you’re probably already thinking that you know the answers and how you can get everything you’ve ever wanted.
For those who don’t have a clue what I’m talking about, let’s go over it quickly.
What is the Law of Attraction?
The ‘law of attraction’ is a concept that has been popularized by a number of self-help gurus, blogs and books and that claims it can help you to accomplish literally anything with the greatest ease. The premise is simple: as you are, so you will attract.
Or to put it another way: fake it until you make it.
The example that is often used at this point to describe the notion is that of giving someone a gift. When you go to give someone a gift, you will usually start by assessing what they have and what they might like. If you have a friend of humble means, who doesn’t like splashing cash and who has hobbies like gardening and reading, you’ll probably get them a book and some gardening gloves with a nice pattern.
Now imagine your other friend. You keep a wide range of company apparently and this person is rich. Ostentatiously so. They splash cash all the time, they talk about their exotic holidays non-stop, they have all the latest gadgets and their home is absolutely beautiful, perfectly modern and kitted out with a ton of exciting features.
What do you buy them? They have everything. They are used to a certain standard of living. So, you probably get them theatre tickets. Or an experience day. Or a cool gadget. A beautiful watch.
You get the point. The rich friend and the person who ‘acts rich’, actually gets more spent on them. They have put signals out into the universe as it were, and the universe has responded in kind. Someone who puts out humble signals and maybe doesn’t ‘act’ quite so rich, ends up with a gift that is much lower in value. Which doesn’t really make sense: surely the less rich friend would appreciate something more extravagant more? Surely it would mean more to them?
This isn’t just about giving gifts though. The same rules hold true in practically everything you do. Imagine those same two people going for a job interview. Who will be offered the more high-paid job?
Simply by acting like someone who is used to a certain standard of living, you will communicate certain ideas to your employers and they will likely see fit to offer you more money to work for them!
Don’t get it twisted by the way: I’m not here to claim that living a moderate, humble life is in any way bad or less successful. It’s absolutely a valid way to live (with a lot of advantages in fact). All I’m saying is that what you put out, is what you get back. If you want to be highly successful, you need to act it.
Likewise, if you are looking to find a partner, what do you think will determine your likelihood of finding someone quickly and of being considered attractive? It ironically, ultimately comes down to just how attractive you already think you are! If you walk the walk and if you act the part, then people will assume that you have something that is worth having. They’ll assume you’re confident for a reason and on an unconscious level, this makes us think that someone must be a good mate – either genetically or in terms of their resources.
We want that person that everyone else wants because it increases our likelihood of passing on our DNA and of our offspring being healthy and strong.
When you believe you are the hotness, so too does everyone else.
In jobs, they say that your responsibilities and thus your salary should correlate with the amount you spend on your hair cut. Ever heard the term ‘dress for the job you want, not the job you have’? This is an example of the law of attraction in action.
Here’s an even simpler and more direct one: facial feedback. Did you know that when you smile, you actually produce happiness hormones? This is true even if the smile isn’t genuine. If you force yourself to smile, then you will become happier. Acting happy, makes you happy.
Did you know that when you work for an investment company, they encourage you to spend lots of money on expensive things? They want you to go out, blow your cash, buy cars you can’t afford, buy flats you can’t afford and maybe even use some substances you can’t afford. They want you to party as hard as you work.
Why? Because that gets you into the mindset they want you in. When you live that lifestyle, you need to make the money to pay for it. When you’re that immersed into the life of an investment banker, you become one
If you switch off and go home to a nice family to watch Midsummer Murders, then you are not going to have the same ‘edge’. I’m in no way suggesting you live like an investment banker. All I’m saying yet again, is that the way you act IS what you will become.
It even comes down to the people you spend time with. Ever heard that you are ‘the average of the five people you spend most time with’? Ask yourself who those people are and what that makes you.
The Problem With the Law of Attraction
Does this law really work? Can you really just fake it until you make it?
The answer is a confusing ‘yes and no’.
Yes, the law of attraction definitely works to a degree. If you head out there with a little more swagger, dressed in expensive clothes, talking confidently and smiling at people then you’ll start to find that life begins to ‘give back’. You’ll find that your life changes in order to fit around the new you and that you impact on the world around you in countless little ways that lead you to a more successful place.
Likewise, if you want a simple, calm life, then you just have to start acting a little simpler and calmer.
But while that’s all true, this can also lead to some lazy thinking. The problem is that many of us feel that because we can attract what we want in this way, it means we can simply sit back and let things come to us.
Just spend lots of money and get rich! It’s that easy!
If I were to honestly sit here and promote that tosh, then it would be highly immoral and a lot of readers would end up broke.
That’s not our aim.
The law of attraction is therefore only one small part of how you can get whatever you want. The other part of it, is being proactive.
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